CAMUS' RUBICON

Perhaps before I go any further, I should make the reader aware that I do not necessarily agree with either Howard Mumma or Albert Camus as they are presented here. Part of the reason I am presenting this is to demonstrate how difficult it is to be a Christian in the modern and postmodern world. But why it matters as much as ever. Specific denominational doctrines are not what I am after; but rather the commonalities we inevitably have in Christ once we are joined to Him. The fact that the bulk of this does go beyond religion, politics, art, industry, and so forth I am hoping to make apparent in this blog -- if not already then eventually.

"So even these great men were confused."

Then Camus said, "and I don't understand to this day -- this man Nicodemus!" I was very pleased when he brought up Nicodemus . I got out the Bible and turned to the third chapter of the Gospel of John and we reread it. We discussed it. He said to me, "Now here is a wise man of Israel! He is seeking something that he does not have. I feel right at home with Nicodemus, because I too am uncertain about this whole matter of Christianity. I don't understand what Jesus said to Nicodemus,' You must be born again."'

I said, "Albert, let's think about this expression,' to be born again,' --because we are moving back to the significance of baptism. What was Jesus' reply?"

Immediately Camus said, " Well, you know what it was! He simply said that you must be born again! I know the exact words:' except a man be born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God,' --whatever that is. And he said,' that which is born of the flesh is flesh and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.'.... I simply marvel at it -- that you must be born again."

"To me," I said, "to be born again is to enter anew or afresh into the process of spiritual growth. It is to wipe the slate clean. It is to receive forgiveness. It is to receive forgiveness because you have asked God to forgive you of all past sins, so that the guilt, the concerns, worries, and mistakes that we made in the past are forgiven and the slate is truly wiped clean."

"I don't know what the French term would be for a bond or encumbrance, but the person who accepts forgiveness now believes that there is no mortgage, no encumbrance on him. The slate is clear, your conscience is clear. You are ready to go ahead and commit yourself to a new life, a new spiritual pilgrimage. You are seeking the presence of God himself." I was nervous and intense.

Albert looked at me with tears in his eyes and said, "Howard, I am ready. I want this. This is what I want to commit my life to."

(I would prefer to interject here that the sense of wonder which struck Camus at that time was relatively free of the general and cultural abuse of the term, "born again," which has been rued by no less a figure than Billy Graham, who said, "I am afraid I have preached a gospel of cheap grace." Familiarity does breed contempt especially in cultural terms when a profound truth is thrown to those who both use it and abuse it and make it seem shallow and ridiculous. There are plenty of evangelists in America and plenty of Bibles and plenty of disenchantment and plenty of disconnection between nature and grace. But in point of fact, what Jesus was talking about, both here and in general, is, as Walker Percy said of the Jews, "unsubsumable." The present-day world has no use for genuine mystery in life, but only a jaded taste for amusement, irony, non-Christian skepticism, and fantasy/science fiction. The important thing is -- "He makes me laugh." (My thanks to Jessica Rabbit.) However, to someone of Camus' culture, nationality, and acquaintances, religious and "irreligious", this term "born again" was relatively new because it had fallen into disuse over the centuries, particularly in Europe, among both Protestant and Orthodox/Roman Catholic churches alike and probably to an equal extent. One could speculate endlessly about the problems associated with being a "state church".)

Of course I rejoiced and thanked God privately that he had come to this. I had a difficult time maintaining my composure. The man had been questioning me now for several years about Christianity and attended services. He had heard my sermons on many occasions and had studied the Bible. Perhaps I should not have been shocked, but it did give me a sense of wonder and amazement that he would be considering taking this kind of step toward Christianity. Yet for some reason I was unable to commit myself fully to the idea. "But Albert," but haven't you already been baptized?"